Funny Shayaris 2

Sheeshi bhari gulab ki, phatthar se phor doon
Pant wali mil jaye to ghanghre wali ko chor doon

Woh jab chalti hai to raahon main 100-100 ke note bichata hoon
Woh chaali jati hai tab uthaa leta hoon

Sheeshi bhari gulab ki, sheesha chatak gaya,
Buddhi ne aankh maari, buddha latak gaya

Dil hai tera dariyaa....Aankhen hain teri Jheel
So my darling ... What's The Big-Deal ??

Dil Logi Ke Jaan Logi
Meri Jaan Set Hone Main Kitna Time Logi

Patharr kyun marte ho, pura pahaar maar do
Hum yuheeen mar jayenge, sirf ek baar aankh maar do

Meri jaib main hai kath, meri rifle bhari hui hai
Mujhe khauf kya police ka, mera baap mantri hai

Neil Armstrong Chand par Gaya aur Farmaya
Ye Saala, Idhar hawa kyon nahin ayaa

Yeh tera chehra hai yaa kele ka chhilka
Jo dekha to dil phisal gaya

Tairna Hai To Paani Main Aao, Kinare Pe Kya Rakha Hai
Ishq Karna Hai To Bahar aa, Ishare main Kya Rakha Hai

Maine tumhare yadon mein ro ro ke tub bhar diya
Magar tum itne bewafa nikle, ki naha ke chal diye

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Maine tujhe dekha
Dekhta raha, Dekhta hi gaya
Phir mujhe chashma lag gaya

Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain
Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge
maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai
bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge

Aaj phir aaye hitchkiyaan Dil-E-Nasaad mujhe
Shayad us sokh ne bhul e se yaad kiya mujhe

Aaakhain taras gaye tumhara khyal aa gaya
Ab to chehra dikha do, naya saal aaa gaya

Gul Gaye Gulshan Gaye, Gul Ke Patte Rah Gaye
Sare Shayair Mar Gaye, Tum Ullu Ke Pathe Rah Gaye

Paida hua Wakeel (advocate) to Shaitaan nay kaha
Lo aaj main bhee Sahab-e-Aulad ho gaya.

Jahaan gaaye the khushiyon ke taraane,
Muqaddar dekhiye roye wahiin par
Hue masjid se Gum juute hamaare,
JahaaN se paaye the, khoye wahiin par

Ghar ghar main diya jale
To diwali mat samjho
Agar main tera peeche paroon
To mawali mat samjho

Khud ko kar buland itnaa
Kay Himaalay ki choti pe jaa pahunche
Aur khuda tumse puche
Abe gadhe, ab utrega kaise

Janaza Mera Nikla, Duniya Dekh Ne Nikli
Magar Woh Zalim Na Nikli, Jiske Liye Mera Janaza Nikla

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Teri Beauty Ne Mujko Appeal Kiya,
Dusri Ko Reject Kiya,
Aur Tisri Ko Select Kiya.

Sheeshi bhari gulab ki, phatthar se phor doon
Pant wali mil jaye, to ghanghre wali ko chor doon

Teri zulf kya hai raat ka saaya hai
Sar mudaa deeya to sawera ho jayega

Tere ishq main janam kya se kya haal ho gaya
Badan se badboo aa rahee hai, nahay jamana ho gaya

Aasman se gira ek chaand ka tukda,
Usse bhi sundar aapka mukhra.

Na teer, na talvaar se ghayal hue hain...
Teri sirf ik nazaar se, ilzaam, Shaayar hue hain

Birdy, birdy in the sky
Why you poo poo in my eye
I didn't sigh, i didn't cry
Thank God, Cow's don't fly !

Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se

Pyar mein kisine Dhoka to kisine kasam khayi hai
Hum wo majnoo hai jisne sirf laat khayi hai

Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
[Audience: Are bhai, aage bhi to bolo.]
Hawa hi hawa hai.

Gam woh cheez hai
Gam woh cheez hai
Gam woh cheez hai
Jisse kagaz chipkaye jaate hain